Musings of the Obsessive Kind

You guys, I just watched Vampire Diaries pilot on CW and it was so crushingly, ridiculously, entertainingly bad.

I mean, it was like a four cheese pizza only minus the crust. Or tomato sauce. Or, in fact, anything except cheese.

My God.

The production values remind me of a high school play (that fog? Ahahaha. Made me think of Russian singer Alla Pugacheva's concerts in late 1980s with the hyperactive fog machine). I am not sure where the money went as it clearly wasn't going towards getting competent actors - you can almost see their brow crinkle as they try to remember their lines. The cardboard darlings, however, aren't helped by a horrific script. Does ANYONE talk like that? Not teenagers, not 60-year-olds, not anyone on this planet.

Also? The actor for Stefan has a face like a Greek God's. Unfortunately, said God is Pan. Honestly - he is ridiculously unattractive. His brother Damon is a sight for sore eyes, being not only hotter but also marginally better-acted, though that is really like saying a cripple is a faster runner than a guy with no legs.

I am going to watch more True Blood as pure self-defense.

You guys, I just watched Vampire Diaries pilot on CW and it was so crushingly, ridiculously, entertainingly bad.

I mean, it was like a four cheese pizza only minus the crust. Or tomato sauce. Or, in fact, anything except cheese.

My God.

The production values remind me of a high school play (that fog? Ahahaha. Made me think of Russian singer Alla Pugacheva's concerts in late 1980s with the hyperactive fog machine). I am not sure where the money went as it clearly wasn't going towards getting competent actors - you can almost see their brow crinkle as they try to remember their lines. The cardboard darlings, however, aren't helped by a horrific script. Does ANYONE talk like that? Not teenagers, not 60-year-olds, not anyone on this planet.

Also? The actor for Stefan has a face like a Greek God's. Unfortunately, said God is Pan. Honestly - he is ridiculously unattractive. His brother Damon is a sight for sore eyes, being not only hotter but also marginally better-acted, though that is really like saying a cripple is a faster runner than a guy with no legs.

I am going to watch more True Blood as pure self-defense.

There are some stories involving vampires that are plain brilliant: Buffy, for one. There are some, like True Blood, which are very romance-novel entertaining and sexy. There are some, like Twilight, which are regressive but wish-fulfilmenty for teen girls.

And then there is this:



This is the promo pic for upcoming Vampire Diaries tv show on CW, every bit as trashy as anyone could dream of.

My eyes! LJ Smith's silly but inoffensively enjoyable books have been turned into this - I am not precisely sure what "this" is, but whatever it is, it's in another galaxy from tasteful. Many have theorized that vamp appeal is sexualized/biting=sex etc etc, but I don't think I have ever seen it as tackily in your face as this - "watch us, we got a threesome!" screams the poster. It looks like the kind of flick they used to show really late on cinemax :)

Also, why does the vamp on the left look like someone's retarded hillbilly cousin?

I am so going to watch. Since when have I been able to resist a trainwreck?

In drama news, I am so excited for Heading to the Ground. We have drama cpr! That's one way to meet someone.

I am quite eager for the trash-feast that CW's Vampire Diaries is going to be, with Twilight-like storyline (yes, I know LJ Smith did it first) of vampires who love to torment themselves by attending high school and falling for shallow girls. What does it start?

But are there actually any good shows in the horizon?

Now, for drama news. First off, Mike He is going to be in a period drama (turn of the century)! And there will be spies, revolutionaries, and beggars. YUM.

In other news, vierran45 posted about Vic Zhou's next drama being The Last Night of Madame Chin, starring Fan Bing Bing as the title character - a 1940s Shanghai dance hostess. Vic Zhou plays one of the men in her life. Oh YES. So I went looking and look what I found!



How can one resist?

( Stills from LNOMC )

Trailer:

I am quite eager for the trash-feast that CW's Vampire Diaries is going to be, with Twilight-like storyline (yes, I know LJ Smith did it first) of vampires who love to torment themselves by attending high school and falling for shallow girls. What does it start?

But are there actually any good shows in the horizon?

Now, for drama news. First off, Mike He is going to be in a period drama (turn of the century)! And there will be spies, revolutionaries, and beggars. YUM.

In other news, vierran45 posted about Vic Zhou's next drama being The Last Night of Madame Chin, starring Fan Bing Bing as the title character - a 1940s Shanghai dance hostess. Vic Zhou plays one of the men in her life. Oh YES. So I went looking and look what I found!



How can one resist?

( Stills from LNOMC )

Trailer:

I will never believe SMeyer didn't read L.J. Smith (an author of teen vamp/witch/etc books who wrote decade+ ago) and steal things from her. I am currently reading L.J. Smith's Vampire Diaries and the similarities are uncanny, and I am not just talking about the fact that both are 4-volume series. Let's see: we have a narrator girl in a small town, whom a lot of boys like. We have a mysterious new boy in her school who is a vampire who doesn't eat humans blah blah. I am too lazy to list the similarities but suffice it to say they are ample.

However, LJ Smith >>>>>>> SMeyer. Smith is a fun, pulpy read while SMeyer is that horrible one-night stand which makes you feel unclean afterwards. Shall I count in how many ways Smith's quartet is better?

1. I have no idea if Elena and Stefan engage in sex in any point during the books, but there is no half-vampire baby biting her way out of Elena's womb and named after a Loch Ness monster.

2. Elena is not my favorite heroine in the whole wide world, but I actually like her just fine. She has a personality!. And *gasp* female friendships. And a world that does not revolve 120% around Stefan. She does not get married out of high school, does not desire to be turned into a vamp, and also does not state every ten minutes how gorgeous her boyfriend is.

3. Stefan - a bit of an angsty vamp cliche but he actually has a personality. And I can see why Elena likes him - he is a very good guy. Oh, and he almost rips the necks off a bunch of people and certainly leaves them in need of long-term hospitalization. Plus, I can actually buy the love story. Most importantly, at no point does he sparkle.

4. Vampire Brady Bunch v. sibling vamps who hate each other and have killed each other in the past? I know who I prefer.

5. These books actually have *gasp* a plot and are not solely about marbley, sparkly perfection of vampiredom. In fact, a rather twisty plot. I approve.

6. Aaaaaangst. There are deaths and resurrections and a lot of torture. Yum.

7. Vampire Baseball? What's that?

*uses icon from another retelling of angsty high school vampire cliche that actually works*

1. I went out and bought a couple more books by L.J. Smith. Basically, she is like Stephenie Meyer but without the sparkling. She is trashy, sure, but it is enjoyable trashy, not painful and idiotic. Sort of like the difference between shoujo manga and a Cassie Edwards novel :P The two novels (of a quadrology) of hers that I've read, also involved a bored high school girl and a sexy vampire who decides that going to school might be fun. They were written 20 years ago, however, so I think someone has been borrowing :)

This said, while they will never be characters I dream about, Elena and Stefan are much much less irritating. Elena is supposed to be beautiful up-front (no silly fake modesty) and Stephan does not sparkle and does not seem to believe in frigidity waiting until vamp marriage. Also, nobody imprints. And there is angst. I bought a few more of her books, too.

2. I think I will start watching Utahime. I give up on KKK2003. It's too depressing and twisted even for me. It's like artistically slashing your wrists and looking at pretty colors.

3. So, I am faced with the realization that the only upcoming kdramas I am interested in are (in order):

a. East of Eden: star-studded historical epic set in 1960s-1970s, about tangled families, politics, and revenge. Starring Song Seong Heon, Lee Da Hae etc etc.

b. Tazza: story about gambling and revenge and organized crime. Starring Jang Hyuk, Kim Min Joon (yum on both!) and Han Ye Seol.

c. The Kingdom of the Winds: a period epic starring Song Il Gook (be still my heart!) as the most capable warrior son of an elderly king slowly going mad. Guess who has to deal with it!

d. Painter of the Wind: in this one, Moon Geun Young masquerades as a man in medieval Korea, in order to be able to learn how to paint and to solve her father's murder. Also with Park Shin Young.

Did you notice something about all these dramas? They are all period (with the possible exception of Tazza. Not sure when it's set, but it does have a retro feel). With the exception of Iljimae, no Korean period drama, whether it's very traditional, like Jumong, or very fusion, like Hong Gil Dong, whether it's set in prehistory, like Legend, or 1930s, like Capital Scandal, has yet to disappoint me. And even Iljimae was merely mediocre, rather than a total disaster. Also, except for EoE, they are all based on either novels or mangas. And not a single one of them is a romcom. I am burned out on them, after a spate of really disappointing ones recently. So let's hope they get my kdrama love back.

3. They are making a Taiwanese adaptation of Skip Beat apparently with Jerry Yan and Ariel Lin as Ren and Kyoko. Heeee. I like SB manga OK but am not a huge fan. Could make a cute drama though. Mainly, I am so amused at the height difference. Ariel is always super-tiny (she could be tiny even in jdramas :P) and Jerry's what, 6'1"? Or more? Heeee.

Though if it's also true that Joe Cheng is going to be this version's Sho, the casting director has been doing bad drugs. Sure, take one of the most popular twdrama pairings and make one the heroine and one the other guy. How well is it going to work out? Yeah...

1. I went out and bought a couple more books by L.J. Smith. Basically, she is like Stephenie Meyer but without the sparkling. She is trashy, sure, but it is enjoyable trashy, not painful and idiotic. Sort of like the difference between shoujo manga and a Cassie Edwards novel :P The two novels (of a quadrology) of hers that I've read, also involved a bored high school girl and a sexy vampire who decides that going to school might be fun. They were written 20 years ago, however, so I think someone has been borrowing :)

This said, while they will never be characters I dream about, Elena and Stefan are much much less irritating. Elena is supposed to be beautiful up-front (no silly fake modesty) and Stephan does not sparkle and does not seem to believe in frigidity waiting until vamp marriage. Also, nobody imprints. And there is angst. I bought a few more of her books, too.

2. I think I will start watching Utahime. I give up on KKK2003. It's too depressing and twisted even for me. It's like artistically slashing your wrists and looking at pretty colors.

3. So, I am faced with the realization that the only upcoming kdramas I am interested in are (in order):

a. East of Eden: star-studded historical epic set in 1960s-1970s, about tangled families, politics, and revenge. Starring Song Seong Heon, Lee Da Hae etc etc.

b. Tazza: story about gambling and revenge and organized crime. Starring Jang Hyuk, Kim Min Joon (yum on both!) and Han Ye Seol.

c. The Kingdom of the Winds: a period epic starring Song Il Gook (be still my heart!) as the most capable warrior son of an elderly king slowly going mad. Guess who has to deal with it!

d. Painter of the Wind: in this one, Moon Geun Young masquerades as a man in medieval Korea, in order to be able to learn how to paint and to solve her father's murder. Also with Park Shin Young.

Did you notice something about all these dramas? They are all period (with the possible exception of Tazza. Not sure when it's set, but it does have a retro feel). With the exception of Iljimae, no Korean period drama, whether it's very traditional, like Jumong, or very fusion, like Hong Gil Dong, whether it's set in prehistory, like Legend, or 1930s, like Capital Scandal, has yet to disappoint me. And even Iljimae was merely mediocre, rather than a total disaster. Also, except for EoE, they are all based on either novels or mangas. And not a single one of them is a romcom. I am burned out on them, after a spate of really disappointing ones recently. So let's hope they get my kdrama love back.

3. They are making a Taiwanese adaptation of Skip Beat apparently with Jerry Yan and Ariel Lin as Ren and Kyoko. Heeee. I like SB manga OK but am not a huge fan. Could make a cute drama though. Mainly, I am so amused at the height difference. Ariel is always super-tiny (she could be tiny even in jdramas :P) and Jerry's what, 6'1"? Or more? Heeee.

Though if it's also true that Joe Cheng is going to be this version's Sho, the casting director has been doing bad drugs. Sure, take one of the most popular twdrama pairings and make one the heroine and one the other guy. How well is it going to work out? Yeah...

I am watching Hello Miss and it's adorable in its adorable adorableness. Is it enough 'adorable' in this sentence? No, not yet. Lee Da Hae is so squishableas the wacky yet oddly vulnerable girl with impeccable background but not enough money and Lee Ji Hoon is beyond cute as that rare drama hero: a genuinely good, sweet, kind and unmessed up guy. I also love the lawyer brother and the tough/vulnerable model girl (yay for cool secondary OTP). Hate the other guy though. Blinding hate, you useless parasite.

They have the cutest chemistry.

A few caps from first ep



( More Caps here )

In other news, I am continuing with Bichunmoo and I love it more and more. Not draggy at all, and perfect balance of love and fighting. And oh, the shippiness. I nearly died when she was taken by evil magistrate in the night, anyway (and I love that she tried to fight and run away, but of course, she can't fight and gets caught again). And even though Jan-Ho has been banned from leaving the mountain, he can sense something is wrong and he sets off at a dead run when he sees she is gone from her house. And he breaks into the fortified palace (!!!!!) and he is all alone, confronting the magistrate and his guests as they try to make Xiulie dance. And he is so young and noble and honest. And he says he will pay her debt, to let her go, but they won't. And he fights all the guards. OMG. I neverly died again at the look on her face when she sees him defend her.

And when they are out of there, I love how they sit quietly together, and she ties his arm (it was cut, and didn't even notice it). And she tells him when she first met him, she took him for a robber, didn't realize he will be a white knight. And they share private things about growing up. I love them. So much.

Only the villain was at that party and now he figured Jan-Ho has the manual he wants. Yikes.

Oh, and even though I haven't yet finished Coffee Prince the caps under the cut made me swoon and swoon and swoon and swoon.

( This way to smoochies )

In non-drama news, I am reading and loving Liz Smith's fantasy/mystery series. SO GOOD. And I bought LJ Smith's The Vampire Diaries and the read is very fun.