The Vampire Diaries pilot - no spoilers
Sep. 10th, 2009 09:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dangermousieYou guys, I just watched Vampire Diaries pilot on CW and it was so crushingly, ridiculously, entertainingly bad.
I mean, it was like a four cheese pizza only minus the crust. Or tomato sauce. Or, in fact, anything except cheese.
My God.
The production values remind me of a high school play (that fog? Ahahaha. Made me think of Russian singer Alla Pugacheva's concerts in late 1980s with the hyperactive fog machine). I am not sure where the money went as it clearly wasn't going towards getting competent actors - you can almost see their brow crinkle as they try to remember their lines. The cardboard darlings, however, aren't helped by a horrific script. Does ANYONE talk like that? Not teenagers, not 60-year-olds, not anyone on this planet.
Also? The actor for Stefan has a face like a Greek God's. Unfortunately, said God is Pan. Honestly - he is ridiculously unattractive. His brother Damon is a sight for sore eyes, being not only hotter but also marginally better-acted, though that is really like saying a cripple is a faster runner than a guy with no legs.
I am going to watch more True Blood as pure self-defense.
I mean, it was like a four cheese pizza only minus the crust. Or tomato sauce. Or, in fact, anything except cheese.
My God.
The production values remind me of a high school play (that fog? Ahahaha. Made me think of Russian singer Alla Pugacheva's concerts in late 1980s with the hyperactive fog machine). I am not sure where the money went as it clearly wasn't going towards getting competent actors - you can almost see their brow crinkle as they try to remember their lines. The cardboard darlings, however, aren't helped by a horrific script. Does ANYONE talk like that? Not teenagers, not 60-year-olds, not anyone on this planet.
Also? The actor for Stefan has a face like a Greek God's. Unfortunately, said God is Pan. Honestly - he is ridiculously unattractive. His brother Damon is a sight for sore eyes, being not only hotter but also marginally better-acted, though that is really like saying a cripple is a faster runner than a guy with no legs.
I am going to watch more True Blood as pure self-defense.
