Dawson's Creek: Cracktastic
Jul. 8th, 2006 01:55 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dangermousieSo, I tried Dawson's Creek.
My thoughts?
1. OMG. They are all scarily blond and WASPy and they have a token Black person who is wonderful and it's a scary scary place.
2. Dawson. Is. Gay. Wincest? No, don't see it. Angel/Spike? Not my cup of tea. Mal and Simon playing doctor? No way. But Dawson is gay gay gay gay GAY. Thus giving Katie Holmes plenty of practice as a beard. He wears little vests, he self-analyzes his feelings to a degree not even a woman does and he likes Katie Couric. He is primetime TV gay cliche. If he was any gayer, he'd be leading the Pride parade instead of participating in it. I am all for it, because talk about unattractive.
3. In other Dawson news. Shut the HELL up. He never stops talking. Ever. I want to ductape his mouth permanently. Also, his topic of conversation? Himself. You are NOT fascinating, Dawson. Stop inflicting your self-absorption on the world. And stop seeing everything through a detached movie lens. You are not Woody Allen. You are snotty and annoying 15, even if you look like a post-doctoral student with a weakness for hair products.
4. Pacey needs to lay off the crack. And the English teacher. He is making the woman risk jail time. Go jerk off to the Internet like any other 15 year old and stop making others commit felonies. Also, his whole "I am 15 and thus jailbait" routine isn't working so well because he looks like a very old 25.
5. Katie Holmes. Mrs. "So I married a crazy cult member" Cruise. She is so wholesome I want to drown her in pancake batter. But only after feeding her some of it first. Gosh, she is skinny.
6. Michelle Williams making out with Dawson? Considering point number 2, this is definitely a trial run for Brokeback Mountain.
Overall fun, if not in the way the makers intended.
My thoughts?
1. OMG. They are all scarily blond and WASPy and they have a token Black person who is wonderful and it's a scary scary place.
2. Dawson. Is. Gay. Wincest? No, don't see it. Angel/Spike? Not my cup of tea. Mal and Simon playing doctor? No way. But Dawson is gay gay gay gay GAY. Thus giving Katie Holmes plenty of practice as a beard. He wears little vests, he self-analyzes his feelings to a degree not even a woman does and he likes Katie Couric. He is primetime TV gay cliche. If he was any gayer, he'd be leading the Pride parade instead of participating in it. I am all for it, because talk about unattractive.
3. In other Dawson news. Shut the HELL up. He never stops talking. Ever. I want to ductape his mouth permanently. Also, his topic of conversation? Himself. You are NOT fascinating, Dawson. Stop inflicting your self-absorption on the world. And stop seeing everything through a detached movie lens. You are not Woody Allen. You are snotty and annoying 15, even if you look like a post-doctoral student with a weakness for hair products.
4. Pacey needs to lay off the crack. And the English teacher. He is making the woman risk jail time. Go jerk off to the Internet like any other 15 year old and stop making others commit felonies. Also, his whole "I am 15 and thus jailbait" routine isn't working so well because he looks like a very old 25.
5. Katie Holmes. Mrs. "So I married a crazy cult member" Cruise. She is so wholesome I want to drown her in pancake batter. But only after feeding her some of it first. Gosh, she is skinny.
6. Michelle Williams making out with Dawson? Considering point number 2, this is definitely a trial run for Brokeback Mountain.
Overall fun, if not in the way the makers intended.
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no subject
Date: 2006-07-08 06:04 pm (UTC)DON'T BE MEAN ABOUT PACEY! Heh. I'd have risked jail time for him. It takes two to tango after all.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-10 03:25 am (UTC)