The funniest and best KoH review ever.

[dangermousie]

First part is a serious critical analysis, the second high-pitched fangirl squeal. Priceless.

here

Samples (from the gushy part, of course):

Here’s Crevette with a second Kingdom of Heaven review for those of you in love with Orlando Bloom... I believe you’re called “women”.

Thank you, general collective gene pool that spawned Orlando Bloom. Your contribution to the sublime creature that is Orlando Bloom is herewith noted and appreciated.

The man was freaking HAWT. He was beyond HAWT. He totally met and exceeded all my HAWT expectations. He is a HAWT overachiever. He is das uberHAWT. He is the GAWD of HAWT. I fall down at worship at the altar of his HAWTNESS

Oh! He's fighting with Liam! Liam just bitchslapped him! YES! YES! YES! ROLL HIM AROUND IN THE DIRT SOME MORE, JEDI MASTER!

OH! Fighting! HIT HIM AGAIN! BLOOD? YAY! ROLL HIM AROUND IN THE DIRT SOME MORE! IT ONLY INCREASES HIS HAWT FACTOR! I'LL GLADLY VOLUNTEER TO TONGUE BATHE HIM CLEAN!!!


Heeeeeeeee.....

Comments

[elvensapphire.livejournal.com]

ROLL HIM AROUND IN THE DIRT SOME MORE, JEDI MASTER! LMAO!!!!!

[dangermousie.livejournal.com]

MMmmmmmmm, icon! *drifts off*

[elvensapphire.livejournal.com]

Oneweekoneweekoneweek! *skips away*

[katranna.livejournal.com]

:-D

Dammit, I'm not a woman?

[dangermousie.livejournal.com]

Apparently :D

[sabaceanbabe.livejournal.com]

Oh. my. god. *wipes away a tear*

[dangermousie.livejournal.com]

Movin, wasn't it? :D

[ancarett]

I laughed, I cried, it moved me, Bob!

Best review ever!

[dangermousie.livejournal.com]

ROFL. I so need to read her other reviews now.

[(Anonymous)]

Absolutely priceless! *rofl* I so agree with her! UberHAWT, indeed. Thanks for sharing that, made my day even better than it already was. (Partly due to the fact that I'm gaining street credibility among my history students with my knowledge of the KoH era - but I better not share these particular sentiments with them, ahem.)

Johanna

[dangermousie.livejournal.com]

Heee. I fear for your students, if due to interest in KoH they stumble on C.B. deMille's "epic" Crusades" which is utterly awful, having Saladdin and Richard compete for Berengaria. Heeeeee.