Pretear: aaaaah, the angsty drama
Mar. 24th, 2006 02:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dangermousieOK, the climactic confrontation between the Princess of Disaster, the two Knights and the new Pretear goes something like this:
Takako: Hayate! Now I shall wreak my vengeance on you for your hideous desertion.
Himeno: How is it your fault again, Hayate? Just because you were nice to her but not in love with her, she decided to burn her Ani DeFranco tapes, paint her nails black and oh yeah, take on the world. According to this logic I should fall for Sasame and go mad when he doesn’t return my love.
Sasame: You must have been reading some of the fanfic on ff.net.
Takako: Bwahahahaha, Himeno! You think you are so special, but believe me, Hayate will use you and discard you just as he did me.
Hayate: Is now the time to say something suitably melodramatic? Ahem…”here is a place where my sin sleeps.”
Himeno: What does that even mean?
Hayate: Well, I am the only male with long dark hair. I simply have to be Byronic.
Takako: Sure, explain the abstract concepts to the girl who doesn’t even notice there is a roofing tile on her head for half a day.
Himeno: Shut it. I am still trying to figure out how old my crush is. If he was old enough to fight and hook up 16 years ago, he is old enough to be my father. I know I was watching too much Buffy! I have an angst-ridden senior citizen on my hands. Should I just nickname him ‘Angel’ and be done with it?
Hayate: Woe. I’d answer but I am too busy perfecting the brooding pose.
Himeno: So, am I macking on a cradle-robber? Anyone, anyone? Bueller?
Three youngest knights: we are here to look cute, so don’t expect us to say anything useful.
Kei: You have metaphysical sex with multiple men daily, and you are fighting against a strip club escapee, and your date’s age is your biggest problem? You are even dumber than I thought, especially since you are crushing on him over me.
Takako: Hey, don’t ignore meeeeeeee! Anyhow, why is she so special? My bust is bigger than hers! Heck, it’s even bigger than Hayate’s martyr complex.
Hayate: That’s impossible. Nothing is bigger than that.
Takako: That's what you think. I am even bustier than I was when I was good. Evil gave me implants.
Sasame: All of a sudden I am in love.
Takako: Hayate, Hayate, Hayate. He was always ‘let’s practice preting some more. Purely to hone your skills.’ But when I started talking commitment, he was all ‘why buy the cow when you can pret for free?’
Sasame: What is this, a soap opera? Oh wait, I am in love with Takako who was in love with Hayate, who is in love with Himeno. I guess it is.
Animators: Five minutes without nudity? It won’t do. Everyone pret!
Sasame: Screw it. I am going evil. At least than I won’t have to share. And she has good dental.
Or at least this is how it should have gone.
Takako: Hayate! Now I shall wreak my vengeance on you for your hideous desertion.
Himeno: How is it your fault again, Hayate? Just because you were nice to her but not in love with her, she decided to burn her Ani DeFranco tapes, paint her nails black and oh yeah, take on the world. According to this logic I should fall for Sasame and go mad when he doesn’t return my love.
Sasame: You must have been reading some of the fanfic on ff.net.
Takako: Bwahahahaha, Himeno! You think you are so special, but believe me, Hayate will use you and discard you just as he did me.
Hayate: Is now the time to say something suitably melodramatic? Ahem…”here is a place where my sin sleeps.”
Himeno: What does that even mean?
Hayate: Well, I am the only male with long dark hair. I simply have to be Byronic.
Takako: Sure, explain the abstract concepts to the girl who doesn’t even notice there is a roofing tile on her head for half a day.
Himeno: Shut it. I am still trying to figure out how old my crush is. If he was old enough to fight and hook up 16 years ago, he is old enough to be my father. I know I was watching too much Buffy! I have an angst-ridden senior citizen on my hands. Should I just nickname him ‘Angel’ and be done with it?
Hayate: Woe. I’d answer but I am too busy perfecting the brooding pose.
Himeno: So, am I macking on a cradle-robber? Anyone, anyone? Bueller?
Three youngest knights: we are here to look cute, so don’t expect us to say anything useful.
Kei: You have metaphysical sex with multiple men daily, and you are fighting against a strip club escapee, and your date’s age is your biggest problem? You are even dumber than I thought, especially since you are crushing on him over me.
Takako: Hey, don’t ignore meeeeeeee! Anyhow, why is she so special? My bust is bigger than hers! Heck, it’s even bigger than Hayate’s martyr complex.
Hayate: That’s impossible. Nothing is bigger than that.
Takako: That's what you think. I am even bustier than I was when I was good. Evil gave me implants.
Sasame: All of a sudden I am in love.
Takako: Hayate, Hayate, Hayate. He was always ‘let’s practice preting some more. Purely to hone your skills.’ But when I started talking commitment, he was all ‘why buy the cow when you can pret for free?’
Sasame: What is this, a soap opera? Oh wait, I am in love with Takako who was in love with Hayate, who is in love with Himeno. I guess it is.
Animators: Five minutes without nudity? It won’t do. Everyone pret!
Sasame: Screw it. I am going evil. At least than I won’t have to share. And she has good dental.
Or at least this is how it should have gone.
