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dangermousieAs I mentioned, I have definitely embarked on a Buffy rewatch. I didn't start from scratch though, because I rewatched the first five eps only a few months back and I might love the show but not THAT much. So it's more of a continuation of a sidetracked watch, than anything.
I am going to put my meta behind cut, not because of spoilers (because come on, can I really spoil Buffy for anyone at this point) but because knowing self, it's bound to be long and rambly. Also, I am a Buffy/Angel shipper, and this is a very B/A-centric ep to start with, so be warned (I don't mind other ships a bit, just have my own preferences and I know people's tolerance for ships other than their own varies).
'Angel' is actually one of my favorite Buffy eps. I'll be frank: it's the unabashed shipper in me, and this is the ep that really launched one of my top 10 ships. True, there was the two parter premiere, with some vibes and coded flirting, etc etc etc. But 'Angel' is where it all really set sail.
First off, I have to admit my shallowness. David Boreanaz? Not the world's greatest thespian at this point. But he is so incredibly gorgeous (he pushes all my buttons which, cavewoman-like, seem to revel in tall-broadshouldered guys, especially when paired with tiny women), and has such crazy chemistry with SMG, I totally couldn't care less.
I think it's interesting that this relationship (of whatever nature) jump-starts really because this is an episode of firsts: before this, Angel would only watch, from the shadows or whatever. He is sort of a secondary Watcher: tips and advice, but no involvement, hands-off. 1.6 is the first time he gets directly involved, the first time he goes into the fight. Part of it is I think that the more he observes Buffy, the more he is drawn in (of course, we'll find out in Becoming that, Bollywood-like, he's fallen in love with her at first sight, but the more he is around her, the more he falls). So he can't stay away, can't stay detached. But also, I think doing useful stuff, feeling emotions other than guilt and misery makes him gain a possibility of interacting in the world. Basically, he's still got his sins, but they don't prevent him from kicking some ass now. (I wonder if he withdrew from agression temporarily because it would be having Angelus too close to the surface, too reminescent of the past. Buffy teaches him about the Good Fight). She's given him back some of his self-esteem, unknowingly.
You know what's interesting? Angel in S1 is rather edgy. I know it's because they were initially considering making him more ambiguous until they were hit with the B/A pheromones, but I find him with that edge, very interesting. Even in S2, while he is 'tamed' by Buffy, he still has his crankiness, or similar, that edge. But of course, his guily post Angelus drives it all out of him, because he is back to point zero (and it's indication to how strongly he is in love with Buffy that he doesn't crawl into a hole right there, but pulls it together). And he is back to being completely minimalist.
But anyway, yes, totally an ep of firsts. This is the first time Buffy and Angel fight together, but definitely the first of many more, and they make a good team. And also, a bit of shirtless fanservice and the chemistry in the kitchen is crazy. Wow. I love that when Joyce come in, she is not exactly too keen on Angel. Because he is older (college age, hee!) and she is sort of protective of her daughter (if only she knew. It would all pale in comparison). Time and distance made me appreciate Joyce. She is not an ideal mother, but she is much better than someone like Lianne in VM. She is trying, but the problem is she thinks she is facing the problem of suburbia, when she is in a horror show instead. So Buffy has to protect her Mom instead of the other way around, and that is sad and awesome, at once.
Speaking of chemistry, I love the scene in Buffy's bedroom. The whole thing with who would take the floor or the bed, very dorama. But yes, the chemistry is crazy, and I love the way he stares at her. You know what is interesting? She tells him to look out of the window to see if the Three are still there and also to keep his back to her when she changes, and he does. He doesn't take a look at her, not once. It's rather a contrast to Xander trying to sneak a peek through a mirror in the previous ep, 'Never Kill a Boy on a First Date.' And I think this is it, in a nutshell, right there. Because Xander's reaction? Totally normal teenage boy and I don't blame him one bit. But how can he compete with Angel? Xander cannot sweep a girl off her feet, while Angel? Can do so without trying, courtesy of Byronic past and the looks.
I love how Angel changes the topic when Buffy asks about his family. Indeed.
You know, I miss when Willow was soft and didn't have that edge yet. She is such a vicarious romantic here. I do wonder why Angel had to stay in the house during the day (I mean, I know why, but why did Buffy want it?) But who cares, because we get to the awesome scene where she thinks he's read her diary and she basically blurts out her liking for him in her embarassment and of course he didn't read it but he admits about wanting to kiss her and OMG, here is another first, the start of: we should stay away but we can't Buffy-Angel dance.
OMG. The KISS. It is really really really HOT.
I would have some other comment on it, but really, that's it.
HOT.
I do wonder why he transforms. Is it because he cannot keep control around her, or is it somewhat deliberate, to get her reaction? Hey, girl, it's better than your first time having sex, trust me.
You know what strikes me about the scene the morning after, where Giles explains that vampires are demons and soul is lost (thus making Angel and Angelus two different people but that's a comment for another time. Let's hope he can collect social security for each). It's Xander's reaction, when he wants Buffy to stake Angel. For the longest time, death is unreal to Xander. I mean, he sees it, but he disassociates it from anyone 'real,' anyone they know as a person. So that is why his attitude is 'stake, move on.' Because otherwise would be to face more darkness.
But I love how Buffy cannot. She will always make an exception for Angel, based on nothing but her gut feeling. She will do it here, before she knows about the soul, before she knows he didn't try to feed off Joyce. She'll do it in S3, when she would hide him from her friends. Buffy has a very big heart (for everyone, not just for Angel).
And that's where Darla comes in (I can never watch this actress in anything else, btw, without expecting her to sink her fangs into something :D). I love the scene with her and Angel, where she tries to rub his face into the fact that he isn't human (btw, Angel's apartment? Very French Intellectual). She comprehends Vampires. She comprehends humans. But a hybrid like Angel, neither one nor the other: confuses her. She keeps thinking of him as a demon who'd go back to 'normal' if you just push the right button but it's not like that. Her dislike of Buffy's influence on Angel isn't even jealousy as much as that she is further polluting her perfect creation, making him more human (love the look on her face when she overhears Buffy and Willow talking, treating Angel like a semi-normal crush object). I do love it when she tells Angel, whether he thought that Buffy would see his true (vampire) face and give him a kiss. Because it makes me think of that ep in S2 (I think it's 'What's My Line, Part 1') where Buffy does exactly that. They really do prove their love for each other over and over, later.
Btw, Darla is creeptastic. I'd be freaked to let her into my house even if I didn't know about her diatary preferences, but then I am not Joyce. Who lets her in and gets bitten for her pains. Of course attracting attention of Angel who is prowling around the house (awwww. I bet he was looking for Buffy to try to explain). And it's interesting to me that Angel has to fight so hard against his instinct, when he has warm, unconscious Joyce, with puncture wounds already there. I love that he manages (but of course that he wanted to further makes him wallow. He loves wallowing, does the boy).
And I love that Buffy does decide to hunt him down (foreshadowing of S2?). And we get that confrontation scene where he half wants her to kill him and half is pissed off to try himself, and for one of the earliest but far from the last times, the rigid rules of the situation get overwhelmed by emotional logic. And he explains about the curse, so I think he lays it all on the table, and who knows what would have happened later, if Darla didn't show up.
A sidenote: I find it very significant that when Giles, Willow and Xander found out it wasn't Angel who bit Joyce, they went looking for Buffy. It's not out of any consideration for Angel, whom they don't know much at all (pervasiveness of death in the town has given them slightly offhand attitude towards deaths of strangers), but because they love and care and worry about Buffy.
To get back to Darla. I love (yes, I know, I used those two words fifteen hundred times. Too bad) how during this whole confrontation, Angel is in complete Buffy-mode, really paying attention to things only through her filter: how will it affect her. Just look at the quick, rather desperate glance he throws her when Darla says she 'made' him. It's all about 'will she really turn away from me now' type stuff. For Angel, for so long, there was nothing in his world, that Buffy really is of enormous importance not just because he loves her but because she is the sole thing in his world.
And I love the looks they give each other when Darla says that Angel loves Buffy. It's as if life-or-death is sort of backseat to their emotional entanglement, and Buffy's joy. Get used to it, guys.
And of course, staking your sire definitely conclusively proves to Buffy whose side Angel is on, and which girl he prefers. :D
And then we get to that awesome tag, probably one of my favorite Buffy ep endings (sidenote: how much do I love the fact that she has 'Angel-sense' and can sense when he is around). Where she sees him in the club, and they walk towards each other slowly, as if they are being pulled, and as if no one else exists, and they talk about how it could never be, never work out etc etc etc but meanwhile their eyes are saying completely different things (yup, another thing to get used to, guys. You are going to be doing this forever, reason and good sense battling feelings) and they are bathed in this warm light, and then there is KISSING! Amazing, awesome kissing. And his wincing and the comment about it hurting and she walks away as he looks after her, and she is somewhat smiling. And she assumed that the hurting comment was about the parting, but the camera pans down and you can see the silouette of her cross burned into his chest.
I just love that kissing her (last kiss as they both thought) was so important to him, was so all-enveloping for him, that he could ignore, could side-line and bear basically being burned. That he could control himself enough to not even morph. Because it was worth it for him.
Whoa.
This is MADE to make them my OTP.
And I love Xander saying he could bear anything as long as they are not kissing, and the romantic-Willow sitting with a grin on her face.
Love this ep.
LOVE IT.
I am going to put my meta behind cut, not because of spoilers (because come on, can I really spoil Buffy for anyone at this point) but because knowing self, it's bound to be long and rambly. Also, I am a Buffy/Angel shipper, and this is a very B/A-centric ep to start with, so be warned (I don't mind other ships a bit, just have my own preferences and I know people's tolerance for ships other than their own varies).
'Angel' is actually one of my favorite Buffy eps. I'll be frank: it's the unabashed shipper in me, and this is the ep that really launched one of my top 10 ships. True, there was the two parter premiere, with some vibes and coded flirting, etc etc etc. But 'Angel' is where it all really set sail.
First off, I have to admit my shallowness. David Boreanaz? Not the world's greatest thespian at this point. But he is so incredibly gorgeous (he pushes all my buttons which, cavewoman-like, seem to revel in tall-broadshouldered guys, especially when paired with tiny women), and has such crazy chemistry with SMG, I totally couldn't care less.
I think it's interesting that this relationship (of whatever nature) jump-starts really because this is an episode of firsts: before this, Angel would only watch, from the shadows or whatever. He is sort of a secondary Watcher: tips and advice, but no involvement, hands-off. 1.6 is the first time he gets directly involved, the first time he goes into the fight. Part of it is I think that the more he observes Buffy, the more he is drawn in (of course, we'll find out in Becoming that, Bollywood-like, he's fallen in love with her at first sight, but the more he is around her, the more he falls). So he can't stay away, can't stay detached. But also, I think doing useful stuff, feeling emotions other than guilt and misery makes him gain a possibility of interacting in the world. Basically, he's still got his sins, but they don't prevent him from kicking some ass now. (I wonder if he withdrew from agression temporarily because it would be having Angelus too close to the surface, too reminescent of the past. Buffy teaches him about the Good Fight). She's given him back some of his self-esteem, unknowingly.
You know what's interesting? Angel in S1 is rather edgy. I know it's because they were initially considering making him more ambiguous until they were hit with the B/A pheromones, but I find him with that edge, very interesting. Even in S2, while he is 'tamed' by Buffy, he still has his crankiness, or similar, that edge. But of course, his guily post Angelus drives it all out of him, because he is back to point zero (and it's indication to how strongly he is in love with Buffy that he doesn't crawl into a hole right there, but pulls it together). And he is back to being completely minimalist.
But anyway, yes, totally an ep of firsts. This is the first time Buffy and Angel fight together, but definitely the first of many more, and they make a good team. And also, a bit of shirtless fanservice and the chemistry in the kitchen is crazy. Wow. I love that when Joyce come in, she is not exactly too keen on Angel. Because he is older (college age, hee!) and she is sort of protective of her daughter (if only she knew. It would all pale in comparison). Time and distance made me appreciate Joyce. She is not an ideal mother, but she is much better than someone like Lianne in VM. She is trying, but the problem is she thinks she is facing the problem of suburbia, when she is in a horror show instead. So Buffy has to protect her Mom instead of the other way around, and that is sad and awesome, at once.
Speaking of chemistry, I love the scene in Buffy's bedroom. The whole thing with who would take the floor or the bed, very dorama. But yes, the chemistry is crazy, and I love the way he stares at her. You know what is interesting? She tells him to look out of the window to see if the Three are still there and also to keep his back to her when she changes, and he does. He doesn't take a look at her, not once. It's rather a contrast to Xander trying to sneak a peek through a mirror in the previous ep, 'Never Kill a Boy on a First Date.' And I think this is it, in a nutshell, right there. Because Xander's reaction? Totally normal teenage boy and I don't blame him one bit. But how can he compete with Angel? Xander cannot sweep a girl off her feet, while Angel? Can do so without trying, courtesy of Byronic past and the looks.
I love how Angel changes the topic when Buffy asks about his family. Indeed.
You know, I miss when Willow was soft and didn't have that edge yet. She is such a vicarious romantic here. I do wonder why Angel had to stay in the house during the day (I mean, I know why, but why did Buffy want it?) But who cares, because we get to the awesome scene where she thinks he's read her diary and she basically blurts out her liking for him in her embarassment and of course he didn't read it but he admits about wanting to kiss her and OMG, here is another first, the start of: we should stay away but we can't Buffy-Angel dance.
OMG. The KISS. It is really really really HOT.
I would have some other comment on it, but really, that's it.
HOT.
I do wonder why he transforms. Is it because he cannot keep control around her, or is it somewhat deliberate, to get her reaction? Hey, girl, it's better than your first time having sex, trust me.
You know what strikes me about the scene the morning after, where Giles explains that vampires are demons and soul is lost (thus making Angel and Angelus two different people but that's a comment for another time. Let's hope he can collect social security for each). It's Xander's reaction, when he wants Buffy to stake Angel. For the longest time, death is unreal to Xander. I mean, he sees it, but he disassociates it from anyone 'real,' anyone they know as a person. So that is why his attitude is 'stake, move on.' Because otherwise would be to face more darkness.
But I love how Buffy cannot. She will always make an exception for Angel, based on nothing but her gut feeling. She will do it here, before she knows about the soul, before she knows he didn't try to feed off Joyce. She'll do it in S3, when she would hide him from her friends. Buffy has a very big heart (for everyone, not just for Angel).
And that's where Darla comes in (I can never watch this actress in anything else, btw, without expecting her to sink her fangs into something :D). I love the scene with her and Angel, where she tries to rub his face into the fact that he isn't human (btw, Angel's apartment? Very French Intellectual). She comprehends Vampires. She comprehends humans. But a hybrid like Angel, neither one nor the other: confuses her. She keeps thinking of him as a demon who'd go back to 'normal' if you just push the right button but it's not like that. Her dislike of Buffy's influence on Angel isn't even jealousy as much as that she is further polluting her perfect creation, making him more human (love the look on her face when she overhears Buffy and Willow talking, treating Angel like a semi-normal crush object). I do love it when she tells Angel, whether he thought that Buffy would see his true (vampire) face and give him a kiss. Because it makes me think of that ep in S2 (I think it's 'What's My Line, Part 1') where Buffy does exactly that. They really do prove their love for each other over and over, later.
Btw, Darla is creeptastic. I'd be freaked to let her into my house even if I didn't know about her diatary preferences, but then I am not Joyce. Who lets her in and gets bitten for her pains. Of course attracting attention of Angel who is prowling around the house (awwww. I bet he was looking for Buffy to try to explain). And it's interesting to me that Angel has to fight so hard against his instinct, when he has warm, unconscious Joyce, with puncture wounds already there. I love that he manages (but of course that he wanted to further makes him wallow. He loves wallowing, does the boy).
And I love that Buffy does decide to hunt him down (foreshadowing of S2?). And we get that confrontation scene where he half wants her to kill him and half is pissed off to try himself, and for one of the earliest but far from the last times, the rigid rules of the situation get overwhelmed by emotional logic. And he explains about the curse, so I think he lays it all on the table, and who knows what would have happened later, if Darla didn't show up.
A sidenote: I find it very significant that when Giles, Willow and Xander found out it wasn't Angel who bit Joyce, they went looking for Buffy. It's not out of any consideration for Angel, whom they don't know much at all (pervasiveness of death in the town has given them slightly offhand attitude towards deaths of strangers), but because they love and care and worry about Buffy.
To get back to Darla. I love (yes, I know, I used those two words fifteen hundred times. Too bad) how during this whole confrontation, Angel is in complete Buffy-mode, really paying attention to things only through her filter: how will it affect her. Just look at the quick, rather desperate glance he throws her when Darla says she 'made' him. It's all about 'will she really turn away from me now' type stuff. For Angel, for so long, there was nothing in his world, that Buffy really is of enormous importance not just because he loves her but because she is the sole thing in his world.
And I love the looks they give each other when Darla says that Angel loves Buffy. It's as if life-or-death is sort of backseat to their emotional entanglement, and Buffy's joy. Get used to it, guys.
And of course, staking your sire definitely conclusively proves to Buffy whose side Angel is on, and which girl he prefers. :D
And then we get to that awesome tag, probably one of my favorite Buffy ep endings (sidenote: how much do I love the fact that she has 'Angel-sense' and can sense when he is around). Where she sees him in the club, and they walk towards each other slowly, as if they are being pulled, and as if no one else exists, and they talk about how it could never be, never work out etc etc etc but meanwhile their eyes are saying completely different things (yup, another thing to get used to, guys. You are going to be doing this forever, reason and good sense battling feelings) and they are bathed in this warm light, and then there is KISSING! Amazing, awesome kissing. And his wincing and the comment about it hurting and she walks away as he looks after her, and she is somewhat smiling. And she assumed that the hurting comment was about the parting, but the camera pans down and you can see the silouette of her cross burned into his chest.
I just love that kissing her (last kiss as they both thought) was so important to him, was so all-enveloping for him, that he could ignore, could side-line and bear basically being burned. That he could control himself enough to not even morph. Because it was worth it for him.
Whoa.
This is MADE to make them my OTP.
And I love Xander saying he could bear anything as long as they are not kissing, and the romantic-Willow sitting with a grin on her face.
Love this ep.
LOVE IT.
