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dangermousieAnd yes, I know no one has any interest. But at least this time it's brief.
I keep thinking that Logan's self-destructive behavior stems from the same place as his designed-to-provoke comments do. It proves to him he matters. It means people notice him, even if they only notice him to hurt him or lash back at him, or whatever. If Big Dick notices him by getting him for screwing his wife, at least it means he notices Logan exists. He keeps provoking Weevil all through S1, Veronica throughout, because he wants their reaction. He hates most being invisible, unimportant. Watch him push Duncan's buttons in this week's episode until he gets that outburst. He doesn't care if the reaction is negative, as long as it's there. In fact, I am sure the self-loathing part of him craves the negative reaction. He just wants to register (and it's interesting that the one time we see him drop the "push buttons" act was when he was dating Veronica, because yes, then he knew he was visible and important to someone without having to go to the unpleasantness place). Logan can deal with hate. He can't take indifference.
I really do think it has a lot to do with Aaron, and not just because Aaron and Lynn's parenting gave him the self-esteem issues so he always needs external validation. If you think about it, Aaron was a largely absent father, and considering how self-absorbed he was, I think the most attention he ever paid to Logan was during the abuse. So we have a situation where Logan's (rather natural) craving for attention ended up being mixed up with all sorts of fucked-up stuff. It would be so simple if Logan just hated Aaron, but the problem is that there is love in there too, however screwed up and poisoned. Just watch him act out after Lynn's death. He is pushing all the buttons he can as if he is almost asking for a beating (and watch him with Big Dick at the gun range, the way he is acting is once again, as if he is missing and trying to re-enact the Aaron-Logan dynamic, with BD=Aaron, only this time Logan's cheating with his SO). Because the sad thing is, the guy is very neglected, and he just wants to connect, even if it's dysfunctional. I bet one of Aaron's little justifications was "I beat you because I care about what you do. If I didn't care at all, I'd let everything slide", so in some perverse way, the fact that the person hurts you=you are important to them, is really stuck in Logan's mind (even if you are only important as someone to hate).
I keep thinking that Logan's self-destructive behavior stems from the same place as his designed-to-provoke comments do. It proves to him he matters. It means people notice him, even if they only notice him to hurt him or lash back at him, or whatever. If Big Dick notices him by getting him for screwing his wife, at least it means he notices Logan exists. He keeps provoking Weevil all through S1, Veronica throughout, because he wants their reaction. He hates most being invisible, unimportant. Watch him push Duncan's buttons in this week's episode until he gets that outburst. He doesn't care if the reaction is negative, as long as it's there. In fact, I am sure the self-loathing part of him craves the negative reaction. He just wants to register (and it's interesting that the one time we see him drop the "push buttons" act was when he was dating Veronica, because yes, then he knew he was visible and important to someone without having to go to the unpleasantness place). Logan can deal with hate. He can't take indifference.
I really do think it has a lot to do with Aaron, and not just because Aaron and Lynn's parenting gave him the self-esteem issues so he always needs external validation. If you think about it, Aaron was a largely absent father, and considering how self-absorbed he was, I think the most attention he ever paid to Logan was during the abuse. So we have a situation where Logan's (rather natural) craving for attention ended up being mixed up with all sorts of fucked-up stuff. It would be so simple if Logan just hated Aaron, but the problem is that there is love in there too, however screwed up and poisoned. Just watch him act out after Lynn's death. He is pushing all the buttons he can as if he is almost asking for a beating (and watch him with Big Dick at the gun range, the way he is acting is once again, as if he is missing and trying to re-enact the Aaron-Logan dynamic, with BD=Aaron, only this time Logan's cheating with his SO). Because the sad thing is, the guy is very neglected, and he just wants to connect, even if it's dysfunctional. I bet one of Aaron's little justifications was "I beat you because I care about what you do. If I didn't care at all, I'd let everything slide", so in some perverse way, the fact that the person hurts you=you are important to them, is really stuck in Logan's mind (even if you are only important as someone to hate).
