Things "Roswell" has taught me.
Aug. 8th, 2005 05:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dangermousie1. The FBI wants you. For dissection.
2. If a girl is given a choice between a popular basketball star or a studious and mysterious loner, the loner wins every time.
3. Make-out sessions before discussing feelings lead to break-ups.
4. So does discussing feelings before making-out.
5. You are doomed anyway (see 3 and 4), so why bother. Buy a Playboy instead.But it will all work out.
6. Highjacking a car will lead to a long and meaningful relationship with the occupant.
7. A human vibrator (tm Michael and Maria) is a good thing, that is also PG.
8. There are Valley Girls in space.
9. Good girls like to watch (Honestly, what was Liz doing, peeking in on Michael and Maria in one ep?)
9. Extracting a bullet out of a stomach wound and getting a peek at her lacy bra at the same time? The new "meet cute."
10. Aliens are hotter. Period.
11. The best way to get a girl is to be sensitive and kind and stare at her longingly and tell her nice things and let her into your soul.
12. Unless you argue with her and bicker and drag her into closets for necking sessions instead. Works just as well.
13. The adults really are out to get you.
14. Members of the opposite sex ARE aliens.
15. If your dream guy takes you out for a romantic evening or even a simple drive together, watch out. Something horrible is going to happen. In fact, being blindingly happy for more than a moment is asking for disaster.
16. Being morose is your best bet. (see number 15).
17. "From up there" doesn't mean Wyoming.
18. Any guy who is sweet and romantic and mature is not of this earth.
2. If a girl is given a choice between a popular basketball star or a studious and mysterious loner, the loner wins every time.
3. Make-out sessions before discussing feelings lead to break-ups.
4. So does discussing feelings before making-out.
5. You are doomed anyway (see 3 and 4), so why bother. Buy a Playboy instead.
6. Highjacking a car will lead to a long and meaningful relationship with the occupant.
7. A human vibrator (tm Michael and Maria) is a good thing, that is also PG.
8. There are Valley Girls in space.
9. Good girls like to watch (Honestly, what was Liz doing, peeking in on Michael and Maria in one ep?)
9. Extracting a bullet out of a stomach wound and getting a peek at her lacy bra at the same time? The new "meet cute."
10. Aliens are hotter. Period.
11. The best way to get a girl is to be sensitive and kind and stare at her longingly and tell her nice things and let her into your soul.
12. Unless you argue with her and bicker and drag her into closets for necking sessions instead. Works just as well.
13. The adults really are out to get you.
14. Members of the opposite sex ARE aliens.
15. If your dream guy takes you out for a romantic evening or even a simple drive together, watch out. Something horrible is going to happen. In fact, being blindingly happy for more than a moment is asking for disaster.
16. Being morose is your best bet. (see number 15).
17. "From up there" doesn't mean Wyoming.
18. Any guy who is sweet and romantic and mature is not of this earth.
