Harry Potter Rants
Jun. 9th, 2005 05:47 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dangermousieI saw a trailer for Narnia recently and thought it was wonderful: the images looked breath-taking, the actors appropriate (and that they could act). And I caught myself wishing HP movies were better made.
As it stands, they are horrible, horrible, horrible. Movies should be able to stand on their own, be good films in their own right, not just pure illustrations.
If you like the movie as a movie, if you think it got the spirit right, you are going to forgive the deviations. I adore the Lord of the Rings movies even though there are differences from the book, because they fall into this category. Unfortunately, Harry Potter doesn’t. There were rumors a long time ago of Spielberg being interested and Haley Joel Osmett for Harry. Well, it might not have been as faithful as the current crop of movies, but it certainly would have been one hell of a better flick.
But at least if you are going for the latter, get the illustrations right. Of course, it would help if you got the director who was passionate about this world, the way Peter Jackson was about Rings or George Lucas about Star Wars. Agree or disagree with their decisions, no one can contradict that they put a lot of thought and belief into their movies. And this passion shows. But more than that, I have yet to see an adaptation that was more miscast than the Harry Potter movies. The casting director on this one should be fired. Out of a cannon. If they weren’t so hampered by having to cast only British actors (which is beyond dumb. You should cast whoever is more appropriate for the role, not make their nationality the be-all and end-all), and if they weren’t so fixated on getting the look right (see the illustration v. good movie approach) they might have gotten further.
This being a children’s movie, none of the leads are enough of an acting powerhouse to make me forget the horrible miscasting (like David Wenham did with his Faramir. When I reread LOTR now, it’s his face I see). Just look at this GOF poster. Yeah, there are some kids who are acting powerhouses. None of them are in these movies.
Let’s go person-by-person.
Harry: I have nothing against Daniel Radcliffe, but he isn’t much of an actor, is he? Or maybe the direction or the script aren’t very good. Either way, doesn’t feel much like Harry to me. Also, his hairdo makes him look like a middle-aged lady, his eyes aren’t green, and he just doesn’t have that aura of intensity that marks an interesting character. In the books, he is my favorite. In the movies, he just looks wrong, like someone who would grow up to be a chartered accountant who collects stamps.
Hermione: the actress is not bad. Best of the trio in fact. But entirely too pretty. This Hermione makes all these Harry/Ron/Draco/every other boy in Hogwarts have fights over Hermione fanfics really plausible. Also, she lacks the bossiness and the bookish attitude of book Hermione. This one is Buffy in the making. To be fair, except for looks, this is more Steve Kloves, the screenwriter’s fault, than hers.
Ron: We pause for a second while I scream. There, now I am better. This boy cannot act. He has one expression, that of a perpetual stoner, on his face. He lookslike someone squished his face unattractive. He has also stolen Anakin’s hairdo from ROTS. However, what looks good on a blond, 6’1” 20-something intense Sith Lord, looks horrendous on a young teen student with red hair. He should establish the new house of Sitherin. His hair is longer than mine. Also, all his moments of bravery, fun, and loyalty have been given to Mary Sue Hermione (I would rant about the script but that would lead to a coronary). The book Ron is a thoroughly nice bloke, a bit laddish when he grows up probably, who is loyal, smart enough, and a great friend. In the book, I could see Hermione potentially ending up with him. I kinda imagined him looking like Jamie Bell (another actor who can ACT) in Billy Elliot. In the movie, he makes me ship H/H and want to cast cruciatus on the casting director and Steve Kloves scream.
James, Peter, Sirius, Remus: Otherwise known as The Ugly Bunch. Entirely too old. By almost two decades (!!!!!!). Also, they must have been the ugliest students to ever attend Hogwarts. Really, in the movies, they probably picked on Snape because they were jealous of his being better looking than they are. Throughout the third movie, Lupin looks and acts as a movie-of-the-week child molester (I loved David Thewlis in Divorcing Jack and KoH but he is beyond miscast), and Gary Oldman is not Sirius, a troubled yet honorable man, but someone who has been hanging out with the Joker for far too long.
Now, I like the casting for Lucius and Snape, and neither both of the Dumbledores, nor Draco bug me, but that is small consolation indeed.
RANT TWO: SHIPPER WARS
Oh, how I wish JKR would pair R/H or H/H or H/G or anyone, short of Draco/Dumbledore only to put an end to the endless shipper wars. Why? Why does it matter in the least? I might think that she is tending towards R/H, someone else might think H/H. How does either really matter in the grand scheme of things? This is a book about a boy wizard fighting a war, not Days of Our Lives. Any romance HP is likely to have is going to be unbelievably peripheral. Yet this is what gets discussed, fought over, and written about 80% of the time. I have a feeling a lot of people ship their preference ship more because of fanfic than anything JKR wrote. And a lot of them are rooting for the ship to show up somebody they had an internet debate with. Come on!
/rant
ETA: Harry doesn't look bad here but still way too mild.
As it stands, they are horrible, horrible, horrible. Movies should be able to stand on their own, be good films in their own right, not just pure illustrations.
If you like the movie as a movie, if you think it got the spirit right, you are going to forgive the deviations. I adore the Lord of the Rings movies even though there are differences from the book, because they fall into this category. Unfortunately, Harry Potter doesn’t. There were rumors a long time ago of Spielberg being interested and Haley Joel Osmett for Harry. Well, it might not have been as faithful as the current crop of movies, but it certainly would have been one hell of a better flick.
But at least if you are going for the latter, get the illustrations right. Of course, it would help if you got the director who was passionate about this world, the way Peter Jackson was about Rings or George Lucas about Star Wars. Agree or disagree with their decisions, no one can contradict that they put a lot of thought and belief into their movies. And this passion shows. But more than that, I have yet to see an adaptation that was more miscast than the Harry Potter movies. The casting director on this one should be fired. Out of a cannon. If they weren’t so hampered by having to cast only British actors (which is beyond dumb. You should cast whoever is more appropriate for the role, not make their nationality the be-all and end-all), and if they weren’t so fixated on getting the look right (see the illustration v. good movie approach) they might have gotten further.
This being a children’s movie, none of the leads are enough of an acting powerhouse to make me forget the horrible miscasting (like David Wenham did with his Faramir. When I reread LOTR now, it’s his face I see). Just look at this GOF poster. Yeah, there are some kids who are acting powerhouses. None of them are in these movies.
Let’s go person-by-person.
Harry: I have nothing against Daniel Radcliffe, but he isn’t much of an actor, is he? Or maybe the direction or the script aren’t very good. Either way, doesn’t feel much like Harry to me. Also, his hairdo makes him look like a middle-aged lady, his eyes aren’t green, and he just doesn’t have that aura of intensity that marks an interesting character. In the books, he is my favorite. In the movies, he just looks wrong, like someone who would grow up to be a chartered accountant who collects stamps.
Hermione: the actress is not bad. Best of the trio in fact. But entirely too pretty. This Hermione makes all these Harry/Ron/Draco/every other boy in Hogwarts have fights over Hermione fanfics really plausible. Also, she lacks the bossiness and the bookish attitude of book Hermione. This one is Buffy in the making. To be fair, except for looks, this is more Steve Kloves, the screenwriter’s fault, than hers.
Ron: We pause for a second while I scream. There, now I am better. This boy cannot act. He has one expression, that of a perpetual stoner, on his face. He looks
James, Peter, Sirius, Remus: Otherwise known as The Ugly Bunch. Entirely too old. By almost two decades (!!!!!!). Also, they must have been the ugliest students to ever attend Hogwarts. Really, in the movies, they probably picked on Snape because they were jealous of his being better looking than they are. Throughout the third movie, Lupin looks and acts as a movie-of-the-week child molester (I loved David Thewlis in Divorcing Jack and KoH but he is beyond miscast), and Gary Oldman is not Sirius, a troubled yet honorable man, but someone who has been hanging out with the Joker for far too long.
Now, I like the casting for Lucius and Snape, and neither both of the Dumbledores, nor Draco bug me, but that is small consolation indeed.
RANT TWO: SHIPPER WARS
Oh, how I wish JKR would pair R/H or H/H or H/G or anyone, short of Draco/Dumbledore only to put an end to the endless shipper wars. Why? Why does it matter in the least? I might think that she is tending towards R/H, someone else might think H/H. How does either really matter in the grand scheme of things? This is a book about a boy wizard fighting a war, not Days of Our Lives. Any romance HP is likely to have is going to be unbelievably peripheral. Yet this is what gets discussed, fought over, and written about 80% of the time. I have a feeling a lot of people ship their preference ship more because of fanfic than anything JKR wrote. And a lot of them are rooting for the ship to show up somebody they had an internet debate with. Come on!
/rant
ETA: Harry doesn't look bad here but still way too mild.
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no subject
Date: 2005-06-09 10:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-09 10:16 pm (UTC)I thought you haven't read the books? :-D
I mean, you already read my entry on why I thought the actors looked the part, but are you just taking my word?
>>But entirely too pretty.
Hmm, I dunno. I don't think she's that pretty. I mean, she's an attractive girl, but I think she skims that line betweeen "pretty" and "average" quite well. She's cute.
>>Ron: We pause for a second while I scream.
:-D Indeed.
no subject
Date: 2005-06-09 10:20 pm (UTC)Re: Hermione. IMO, she's such a Mary Sue in the flicks.
no subject
Date: 2005-06-09 10:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 12:17 am (UTC)I just wish they weren't making these movies at all, just like Rowling wanted all along.
Also, I get the Ron-Hermione vibe too. I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking that! I could totally see them getting married, having a half a dozen kids (mostly girls), Hermione having a high paid position in some prestigious magical field while Ron is the stay-at-home dad. Uh... This I came up with, and I neither read nor write fanfic. Sheesh.
Finally, I feel a bit like a dumbass but - what exactly is a Mary Sue? And... "shipper" wars?
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 12:26 am (UTC)My biggest gripes are Ron and the Marauders. Ron was cute when he was a boy, but he's not anymore and he hasn't developed any acting to back it up. The Marauders are way too old. Thewlis is horribly miscast as is Oldman in my mind. Sirius is still supposed to have a semblance of dignified good looks, Oldman just looks kinda weasely.
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 02:11 am (UTC)Yeah, these shipper wars ARE getting annoying... but I think JKR just likes messing with fandom's collective head :\
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 03:09 am (UTC)The shipper wars just annoy the heck out of me, as it doesn't seem so important at all. They were 15 in the latest book, people!
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 03:19 am (UTC)what exactly is a Mary Sue? And... "shipper" wars?
See, if you read fanfic... :D
Mary Sue: a self insertion for the author, she is perfect and everyone tells her so. The story revolves around her and the male hero of her choice falls for her. She knows everything and is PERFECT!
Shipper Wars: "shippers" are "relationshippers" i.e. people who like one (usually) romantic relationship. E.g. one can be a Raj/Simran shipper in DDLJ, or (if you had too much sun) be a Simran/Kuljit shipper. Shipper wars are when those two kind of shipppers start arguing which one is better and which one is meant to be (e.g. Shipper 1: Harry and Hermione are meant to be. Shipper 2: You suck! Ron and Hermione are the Real Thing. Repeat this ad nauseam).
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 03:21 am (UTC)DR isn't that bad, but his vibe is all wrong. I cannot imagine him doing the angry, messed-up Harry. He just doesn't have the edge. I cannot imagine him in Order of the Phoenix.
Don't even get me started on the Marauders. They are SO wrong!
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 03:51 pm (UTC)The Marauders...just horrible. I wanted Gerry and Ewan to be Sirius and Remus. They were more the right age (late thirties). If Peter got married in his early twenties and then quickly had Harry (which the books lead you to believe he did) and Harry is about 15, then they should all be in their late thirties, not in their mid to late forties as they are in the movie. Part of this problem was caused by Alan Rickman, since if he and the Marauders are the same age, he's automatically made the actors need to be older to look the same age as him. But this really could be gotten around because with the dark hair, it's sort of hard to pin point Rickman's age in the movies.
The artwork in the books also makes the Marauders look significantly younger than the people cast in the movie.
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 04:09 pm (UTC)Yeah, James had Harry when he was 20 or so, which means in PoA the Marauders would be in mid-30s. And not only do they not look right, they don't act right either. Grrr.
Re: Harry. I am rereading OotP and mind boggles imagining DR in the role. I wonder what Haley "AI" "I see Dead People" Osmett would have done. He is all physically wrong, but he might have been much better.
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 04:20 pm (UTC)I pick Gerry because he's very masculine and dark, like Sirius was. Out of the three Sirius was pointed out as the one that turned the women's heads, was outgoing and pretty good humored. Ewan because he has that inate, sort of quiet sweetness. Very likable. You could completely understand Harry feeling at ease with him.
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 04:25 pm (UTC)I never could find someone for Sirius, but as soon as you mentioned GB, a lightbulb went over my head. He has that dangerous and rough edge but is also blockish. And of course he is goodlooking. Perfect fit.
Re: DR. One could always hope. You know what cracked me up? I was looking at some picture of Hayden and thinking he looks like fanon Draco (that mythical being that has nothing in common with the canon one). When fandoms collide :D
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 04:36 pm (UTC)Ewan I would have loved. He did likable teacher in RotS and would have been ideal. Unfortunately Remus now reminds me of a child molester.
Yes...fanon. When character who have been specifically described a certain way find themselves in suddenly improved circumstances (or worse circumstances, depending of the vindictive fangirl who gets ahold of a female character).
Thing is I DO actually think Hayden would have made a great Tom Riddle.
no subject
Date: 2005-06-10 04:43 pm (UTC)Yes. And he looks tough enough to have been able to survive it. You can imagine him doing both the rage and the warmth. Unfortunately, the Sirius they have now looks like a Frenkenstein-animation process gone bad. And in real need of medication.
Unfortunately Remus now reminds me of a child molester.
Oh yes. I am glad I am not the only one who thought so. Now, when Harry sneaks off for private lessons, I want to go "where did he touch you?" instead of "awwwwwwww" Ewan would have been beyond wonderful. We are supposed to like and feel sorry for Lupin and not get the "ick" reaction. Guuuuuuhhhhh...*frustrated*
Fanon: Three words. Draco. Leather Pants. ROFL.